


The Times I Fell in Love

by thewayshefell



Category: Original Work
Genre: Angst, Happy, Love, several stories
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-03
Updated: 2019-08-03
Packaged: 2020-07-30 10:14:14
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 1,188
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20095606
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thewayshefell/pseuds/thewayshefell
Summary: Love does not always have to be romantic. It comes at different times for different people, and some never find the love of their life while others find several. The way our universe works we will never know but what I do know is I will always love you.Updated on Saturdays and Wednesdays.





	1. Chapter 1

Our life was mediocre at best, we had enough to feed and clothe ourselves and we found happiness in each other. We would dance in the kitchen and talk for too long when we had to get up early for work. We were stressed but we were happy and we had each other. Out of all our lives, my favorites aren’t the short memorable ones but the ones where we got to spend the most time together.  
I hated the ones where we didn’t officially meet. Where I was to late, and you had already left for the next one or when I got a head start on the next life without ever properly meeting you. Even in the life where we never physically meet I still know who you are after. The boy I read about in the paper getting a scholarship, the girl who died in a car crash. You always impacted my life in the strangest ways and I still loved you. I didn’t know why until the end of those chapters but I always cared.


	2. 2.

This time, I found you on a train. I sat next to you on accident, thinking you were an old friend, but was too embarrassed to move. You said hello in a brazen voice and tilted your head.  
“Hello” I quietly responded, taking out a book and I tried to read to hide my embarrassment but I could not stop glancing your way. You kept catching me but i couldnt stop myself from looking over. You finally gave me an amused smirk, and made a joke about something in the book, leaning in slightly, making everyone else on the train disappear. When you talked to me it felt like it was us against the world, even though we had just met. You got off three stops from where I got on.  
We didn’t meet again in that lifetime, but you stayed in my heart.


	3. 3.

We were young and feeling alive, a war was on the horizon but we had each other so we didn’t care much. We meet dancing, my friends took me out for my 18th and your friends dragged you along because they were going to sign up for the war. We feel in love hard and quickly but that didn’t make it any less real. We were passionate and reckless and so in love. You were drafted and we married that night against everyone’s wishes. They said we were young, we were being reckless, we didn’t know anything about the world yet.

I wish it would have stayed that way. Reckless and in love. I wrote you everyday, your comrades made fun of you endlessly but we both know it was because they were jealous. I loved you so much. But, We learned about the world too quickly. You were sent to the front, far away from home. I prayed for your return every night. I prayed for your safety. You came back for a short leave. You promised the war would be over soon, and that you'd come home to me safe and sound.

I cried after you left, not wanting to worry you. I still wrote you everyday, my love for you only growing with each letter. I found out that I was pregnant on the same day soldiers showed up on my door with a stack of letters. You broke your promise. I was lost for so long. I still have days where there is nothing I feel but overwhelming sorrow from your loss. We were stupid and in love but you were my everything and then it was gone.

My everything was taken from me and then I had your baby as a consolation prize. The entire pregnancy was so hard. I had to go through it alone, and every time the child moved it was just a reminder that you were gone. I felt so ashamed from my feelings, everyone told me a child was a blessing and it was so hard to believe them when it came with the curse of not having you. 

Sometimes I wanted to end it all, or give the baby up for adoption. I wasn’t myself at all, it was difficult to feel anything besides indifferent. Your mother had to come stay with me for awhile, she pulled me back a little. Enough. Enough to realize I couldn’t give up the last bit of you I had. Enough to realize that he wasn’t a consolation prize but a reward for our love for each other. Our baby. Our son.

My everything became him. He was the love of my life, just like you are. You were returned to me in your son's eyes, the way he laughed, in his devilish smile when he did something he knew he shouldn’t have, how he cared for things. The first time I laid eyes on him, I held him, I realized that you had kept your promise. You came home to me. I am so grateful for your love.


	4. 4.

Falling in love was one of the hardest things I ever did. Everyone said that falling in love would be easy, staying in love would be hard. It was the opposite for me. Falling in love with you was difficult, letting you in, sharing my emotions.

But staying in love with you, that was so easy. Your compassion always captivated me. The way you said my name like I was the only thing keeping you attached to this world. You pulled my heart out even with me fighting you every step of the way. I don’t think I will ever be able to love something the way I love you.

It isn’t always perfect, in fact it never is. I know that you are frustrated with me, I know that I am difficult. I wish it was easier, to let you in. I wish that I could express how much I love you. I am afraid that I am going to push you away with my attitude and my wall of indifference. Every time I try you you show me what love is with your patience.

I know that I have grown into a better person because of this relationship and I wanted to thank you. I know some stories end in heartbreak but I will do everything in my power to make sure ours isn’t one.

Our beginning was hard, with fights and jealousy. Most of it is my fault for not knowing how to express my emotions properly. Not that you never lose your temper love, because you do, but I know that I needed to change and grow for our relationship to be successful and I am so glad that you allowed me the time and freedom to.

I am sorry our beginning was so rocky, but I know I can promise you that I will never love someone as much as I love you and I will never stop loving you. I was missing an entire part of my life without you. I hope I can make your life as whole as you make mine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It is kinda a recovery chapter, I know the last one may have been a little heavy. BUT HEY next up is gay.


End file.
